23 6 / 2013
"Sit down. Why don’t I know you?"
"I’m new. My husband used to just be a Senator."
"My husband was just elected President…"
"No, no. I know how this works. I’m not retarded. So you’ve never actually been First Lady before? Shut up. Shut up."
"I didn’t say anything…"
"A new First Lady, That’s really interesting. But you’re, like, really pretty."
"So you agree? You think you’re really pretty?"
"Oh, I don’t know…"
"Oh my God, I love your bracelet. Where did you get it?"
"My daughters made it for me."
"Oh, it’s so fetch."
"What is ‘fetch’?"
"Oh, it’s, like, slang. From England."
"So, if you’re First Lady…why are you black?"
"Oh my God, Nancy, you can’t just ask people why they’re black!"
"Could you give us some privacy for, like, one second?"
"Ok, you should just know that we don’t so this a lot, so this is, like, a really huge deal."
"We wanna invite you to have lunch with us every day for the rest of the week."
"Coolness. We’ll see you tomorrow."
"On Wednesdays we wear pink!"
23 6 / 2013
glitter-lace-sophistication said: Oh my goodness, I discovered your blog a few months ago and I loved it! I just revisited it today and I laughed just as hard at posts I have already read! I love your blog soo much! It's so clever, not to mention that mean girls is one if the greatest movies!
Aww! Thanks, dear! We really appreciate it! :)
23 6 / 2013
"So, are there any jobs you’ve thought about doing after being First Lady?"
"Well, there is this one government job…"
"What is it?!"
"Is it a Cabinet job?"
"It’s Secretary of State."
"Oh, no, you can’t be Secretary of State. That’s Hillary’s old job. She had it for four years. Yeah, and then she was devastated when Barack fired her last winter."
"I thought she quit so she could run for President?"
"Ok, irregardless, old jobs just off-limits to friends. I mean, that’s just, like, the rules of feminism. Don’t worry, I’ll never tell Hillary what you said. It’ll be our little secret."
Later that night…
"I know your secret."
"Secret? What are you saying about?"
"Laura told me that you want to be Secretary of State. I mean, I don’t care, do whatever you want. But let me just tell you something about being Secretary of State: All you do is travel wherever you want, meet world leaders, and have the American public fall in love with you."
"Is that bad?"
"But if you want it…Whatever, I mean, I could talk to some people for you if you want. But wait, aren’t you so mad at Laura for telling me?"
"It was pretty bitchy, but I’m not mad. I mean, I guess she just likes the attention."
"See, Laura, I told you she’s not mad."
"I can’t believe you think I like attention!"
"Ok, love you, see you tomorrow!"